Are you hooking up with someone and you want things to progress into more than just sex? Well, you're in luck! InstantHookups.com has all the most helpful tips that'll tell you how to avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone, so that you can potentially become more than a hookup to this person. There's no reason you shouldn't keep your option open, but if you're particularly interested in this person and think you want to date them, don't get stuck in that sex-only zone. Once you're there, you won't be seen as potential for anything more than fantastic sex - which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but not great when you want to be dating this person.
There are a few different ways you can stay out of the hookup zone, so you can choose your approach. You don't want to give your hookup too much power over the situation, because that could land you immediately into the hookup zone with no hope of ever getting out. Save yourself the hassle of trying to climb yourself back into eligible territory, and avoid the hookup zone altogether with our advice!
If you're trying to avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone, try to spend more time with them outside of your hookups. There are a few different ways you can accomplish this, but the important thing is that you're around them, and they're enjoying your company. You could try the Netflix and chill option, ask them on date, or be super sly about it and have things progress without them realizing it, but whatever approach you take, you're going to need some advice on making it happen.
We've got a few suggestions on how you can spend more time with your hookup, and have them actually want to hang out with you when you aren't having sex. It's key to read the signals though, so that you aren't wasting your time with someone who clearly doesn't want anything to do with anyone that doesn't only want sex. If you want to stay out of the hookup zone, be sure that it's worth it with this person. Once you're sure, try the following methods to avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone!
One easy way to avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone and spend more time with your hookup is to hang out after you two have sex. Suggest maybe ordering some food and watch Netflix, chilling and hanging out. Read their reaction, and if it's positive, you're a go! It's officially been established at this point that you two can have sex and hang out, and that's a great way start to staying out of the hookup zone. If, however, you sense any hesitation or negative response, it's not a good idea to follow through with it.
Even after the first time, you want to be sure to ask if they want to hang out, don't just assume it'll happen because you're hooking up. The more comfortable things become, the better the chances that you two can form something more than just hooking up. You'll definitely be well outside of the hookup zone if you two are spending that kind of time together! Don't get discouraged if they can't hang out after a hookup sometimes, and don't ask them every time. You don't want to seem desperate, so ask once in a while, and gradually increasing how often you do.
If you feel comfortable enough, ask your hookup out for dinner. This is a bold move, and one you should probably be pretty confident in making before you go ahead and do it. If you want to continue hooking up with this person, don't risk asking them out on a date if you aren't sure they'd be down. If you feel like you two have a good connection, and think that they would genuinely respond positively to you asking them out, then go for it! Ask them out for dinner and see what they say.
If they say no, don't be completely discouraged. Just because they don't want to have a romantic dinner with you doesn't mean you're stuck in the hookup zone. You could just be someone they they don't see dating romantically, but maybe they would want to be friends outside of your hookups! Friends with benefits isn't in the hookup zone! It could be an ideal situation, so if you don't think you two have a romantic connection, but you don't want to be stuck in the hookup zone, consider this approach.
Your reasons for wanting to know how to avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone might not be romantic, you might just like spending time with this person and want them to continue to be in your life. Hookups are temporary by nature, so wanting to keep being around someone that you've been hooking up with doesn't always happen. If you want to keep them around, you really have two options - romance, or friends. You might have more positive results becoming a friend of theirs than by trying to date them, depending on the time of relationship that you two have.
Try hanging out with them platonically, without trying to make a move. You can even make it clear to them and just tell them what you're doing, and they might be 100% down for becoming friends with benefits, and not just a hookup. Sure, you'll stop having sex eventually, but you won't stop hanging out together, and that's the main goal here. Your goal is to stay out of the hookup zone, and once you've made it here, you've officially done it!
If you want to remain firmly outside of the hookup zone, don't give in to your hookup's every whim. Don't be at their beck and call, or let them say when you hookup and where every time. It not that they're trying to be mean, it's just that if they think of you as just a hookup, then they might not think anything of what they're doing. We're going to tell you what you need to do to stay out of the hookup zone, and establish yourself as part of their life outside of your hookups.
There's are wrong ways to do this, so we're going to make some helpful suggestions on what we mean when we say not to give in to them. It's easy, and requires very little on your part for the most part. These are really only helpful if you're romantically interested in your hookup, because if you just want to be friends, you're not likely to have to do much. It's easy to become someone's buddy, it's much harder to become their romantic interest. Here are some ways that you can do that.
Don't be available every time they message you for a hookup. You're less interesting if you never have plans and are always at their beck and call for a hookup. Say no sometimes, even if you don't have other plans! Keep them guessing, make them ask "what are they doing?". If you're on their mind, then that's a good sign! It does help to actually make other plans, though, so you do keep yourself busy. You don't want to be pining over your hookup on a Saturday night hoping they message you. Make plans with your friends and have fun!
There's nothing wrong with lying and pretending that you're busy when you're trying to get your hookup interested in you beyond sex, especially something so small. You don't owe them anything, so don't think that you have to be honest and forthcoming and about every aspect of your life and everything that you. Save that for when you're actually dating. Decline every now and then, and let them want to know more about you, and wonder why you can't hookup with them!
Avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone by making your hookup jealous, and having them realize that they might just have more interest in you than just casual sex. You can make them jealous in a few different ways, depending on how you want to approach it. You could decline a hookup invitation from them and say that you have a date, even if you don't. This will automatically make any hookup feel a twinge of jealousy, so you're on the right track! Stay on this path and you're guaranteed to win them over and stay out of that zone!
You could also talk about your other hookups and relationships, or hit on other people in front of them. If you're just a hookup then they shouldn't care, right? Wrong! They will care, and they'll want to get you out of the hookup zone, and into the dating zone! It's nearly impossible to watch someone that you're sleeping with hitting on someone else without feeling jealous or possessive, so use this to your advantage to avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone.
As much as you can, be in control of the situation with your hookup, especially if your feelings are stake. Make sure that you aren't the only who's always agreeing to hookups, or the one who's always initiating them. You want it to be fair, so if you feel like you're setting up too many of your encounters, hold back for a bit. Let them contact you, and then continue with your hookups. If you feel like you're always agreeing to hookups, then either make an effort to set up more booty calls, or say no once in a while. There are two very easy ways to fix that.
Try to go with the flow and have fun when you're together, but there are elements of control at play with casual hookups. If you can get a handle on things and equal it out, or be in full control of how things are going, then you're in a great position! You can make sure that you avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone, and can find your way in their life somehow, whether it be friends, or something more, but either way you'd be happy. This is where you want to be!
If your hookup isn't receptive to any of your attempts to avoid getting stuck in the hookup zone, then they clearly only want hookups. Don't waste anymore time having casual sex with someone who you want to have more with, when they have no interest in that happening. Save yourself the grief and get out of there. Stop hooking up with them, delete their contact info, and forget about them, because they don't want the same things that you do. You'll only end up disappointed and heartbroken, so don't let it happen.
You can't change someone's mind who doesn't want anything but a hookup, so if you can't just be friends with them, leave the situation. Don't become friends with them in the hopes that one day you'll become more, because it won't happen. You're just wasting more time and effort on someone you shouldn't, so do what's best for you. There's no point keeping someone in your life who only wants sex from you, because they serve no benefit to you whatsoever if you want more from them. It's not fair to you, so don't do it yourself.